Category Archives: She says

Alien Royalty

Kimberly was adopted at birth. Whenever she’s asked what nationality she is, or anything about her background she claims she’s an alien.  Oprah had a long lost sister, so now she swears she’s related to Princess Di somehow.  She still … Continue reading

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Sizzle

The family goes to Las Margaritas a lot.  They know we need extra salsa for mom to drink, and to keep the chips flowing.  Mom gets nervous around anyone with an accent and always does something worth watching.  Our waiter … Continue reading

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Emberly

Mom drinks a lot of Diet Dr. Pepper from the 76 station down the hill.  We go at least once a day.  Peter, the owner from India, always greets us with “hows your days?”.  He talks to us about our … Continue reading

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Pink Taxi Cab Confessionals

Kimberly drove a pink 1981 checker taxi cab for most of the years I grew up. It was cool. License plate said “BUBLGUM”. It had jump seats in the back that were like bouncy chairs.I thought I was TS every … Continue reading

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Christmas Trees

“If I was rich I would buy 2 Christmas trees.  One for the house and one to keep on my car all season long.  Don’t you just think whenever you see a tree on a car that those people are … Continue reading

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Bad Words

Kimberly was mad in the car one day.  Someone said something that really pissed her off. She searched inside her for the right words, turned around and screamed “DOG BREATH YOUR BUTT!!”.

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